Just this one time. And that’s all. But promise me to never do it again.
I got up and listened to my own self. I later then met two wise men. One told me to listen to my heart and do what I need to do. He said that we are meant to do what we want and what makes us happy. Lets call this guy Lee
The other man told me that our “self” is a very dangerous soul and we should be very careful with it. We should not give into anything it wants. And we should not self indulge into whatever it tells us too. Lets call this guy Bob.
I was confused but I really liked what the wise man said about giving in to what I want or maybe even need. Made the most sense. At least when you just want to do what you want to do. Lee then told me that of course there is what is illegal and that I cannot do. Like robing a bank. I cannot do that. But apart from that, just listen to you heart and do as you desire.
Bob told me that desire can be dangerous and that I may end up in a real rut if I’m not cautious with that I do. Also told me that life is about discipline and not desire. We did not make it to where we are by giving in to each and every desire. All the greats have amazing discipline that differs them from the rest.
Lee told me I must experience life in its fullest and do what makes me happy. He used the cliche ” You’ll never know if you never try”. Happiness was a step away. All I had to was approach it and then I’d be very happy.
Bob warned me and said, here’s what’s going to happen. I stopped him right there and told him “Bob, stop spreading your negativity. I don’t want to be a part of it”.
Lee then took my hand and told me to go ahead. And I did. I didn’t feel one bit guilty, cause I was doing what I was meant to do. I was then hooked. I couldn’t let go. And when I did let go, I would suffer in a lot of painful ways till I gave in again. Thank God that it was triathlon that I got hooked too. Imagine if it was something else!! I then looked at Lee’s life and took a took good like at what he had to offer people around him and not just me. He hung with a bad crowd. Was always secretive and you could not really tell what he was up too. He seemed very shiny and wise though. But as I looked closer, he wasn’t happy and preyed on people like me. He simply got his fun out of that.
Lee was very open about everything he’d do. He was shiny in a way where people would immediately feel comfortable towards him. Lee told me that giving into desire can either be the best thing you do for yourself or the worse. He said that everyday we give into alcohol, entertainment, drugs, pornography etc and the outcome is usually bad. All it takes is one time. Just one little time to try it. Just to say that I’ve done it. We usually think that it leads to happiness. But that is not happiness and that is not a calling. That is an empty soul telling us it needs saving and a moral compass that can lead it. All it takes is one try.
I asked what was that he wanted to tell me when I stopped him. He looked at me and said, “The one thing that you try once. That desire deep down inside you know is going to cost you ( just like how expensive triathlon is ) either turns out to be an addiction that will lead to your destruction ( destruction of you health, wealth, happiness, family and friends) or it will be a nasty recreational habit that you can’t get rid of. Do not try it just once. Don’t ever try it and feed your soul the goodness it’s looking for”